Thanksgiving - a Quentin Tarantino Film

"What a long strange trip it's been" - Jerry Garcia

We were on the outskirts of Dallas when the drugs began to kick in…..

So,

We went down to the Sister & Brother-in-laws’ place for the holiday. The trip down was fine….except for being like 18 hours long.

Off topic, but kinda on topic. I can now say that I have seen a fairly large amount of the major cities west of the Mississippi. In my opinion the cities on the west coast, and in particular the Pacific Northwest (PNW) are uniquely dirty. I mean filthy.

During this trip in particular, we passed through Dallas, Austin, Little Rock, and near to San Antonio. You know how many homeless camps I saw? One. You know how many times I saw graffiti? I can count it on one hand. There are over 6 million people in the Dallas Ft. Worth metro area.

Try that shit in Portland. Or San Francisco.

Clean your crap up west coast! Literally. I mean stop allowing adult Democrats to crap in the streets. Yes, it is the Democrats doing this. No, I’m not a Republican.

Anyway….off tangent - back to the story. So we went down to the In-laws and had a great Thanksgiving on the gulf coast. On the first day I’m there my work computer goes tits up.

No stress, I have my personal machine and I backup my files. Jesus saves. So do I. So I moved over to my backup plan and Charlie Mike’d. No stress. Here are the pics from Thanksgiving.

Yes, it is warm there. Its the gulf coast. Actually it was a little cold by their standards….highs in the 60s and lows in the 40s. Not bad for late November in my opinion. Here’s FarmDog© doing her thing.

We even got to have a night without kids!

After a wonderful four days with the family we left with tears in our eyes for the long trip home. Now here is where stuff goes sideways. Don’t turn away now.

So…..we get like almost halfway home. Outside of Shreveport Louisiana, the truck decided to take a dump. Idles fine - but wont give it any power. I’m able to limp into uncle Jim Bobs travel center. Keep in mind that this is about 2:00 Sunday afternoon in Louisiana. I think it’s a sin to work on Sunday in Louisiana. Try getting a mechanic - I dare ya. Anywho… I get a hold of A place that will actually send me a dude to look at my truck.

By the time he gets there its almost dark. Its gonna cost me an arm and a leg, but we gotta get home, ya know. He takes a gander.

Diagnosis…..bad fuel filter. I guess this guy is supposed to be changed every 10k miles. My bad. So we sourced the parts and get that done about 7. Yes, that cost a Sultans ransom…but it needed to be done.

On the road and running like a top. For about 45 minutes. We loose it outside of Ida, Louisiana. Like DRT.

Urban Dictionary:

In this context, DRT stands for “Dead Right There,” used by emergency responders (EMTs, paramedics, police) to describe a deceased person, often in a dramatic or sudden manner.

“He got hit by a truck and there's barely anything left. Definitely a DRT.”

Again, I can kinda keep it idling for the heater but we ain’t goin nowhere.

Yes, yes we would. Ride or die baby…..

I get a hold of the insurance company. They setup a tow. And by setup a tow I mean “send a freaking app link to click some buttons and get service”. Apparently they only cover 15 miles worth of tow. They want to send us to like “SomeDudes” driveway. I guess “SomeDude” has registered hisself (all southern and shit) on the google as a “mechanic shop”. Um…no. I mean I’m sure he is great and all, but I need me a no shit diesel mechanic, not a dude who does oil changes and installs truck nuts in his home garage.

After about 2 hours and a couple of phone calls with outsourced “customer support” (which by the way this shit has got to stop!) and a couple of hundred dollars more we finally got dropped at the Ford dealership in Texarkana. At like 10:30 PM. We got a repair to pay for so we crash in the cab of the truck. Kinda. It was cold. 32 that night. Embrace the suck.

Next morning, I’m up “Johnny on the spot” (like I slept at all) and am standing there when the service department opens at 0730. ‘Ol boy says no problem and gets his best man on it. Like a 30 year no shit diesel mechanic. Ok….now we are getting somewhere - it’s just gonna cost a couple of hundred more. Fuck it.

Good news - bad news.

The Louisiana guy was almost right. As it turns out the relay powering the fuel pump in the tank bit the dust after the 22 years since it’s installation. I guess there are two fuel pumps on a 7.3L Ford Powerstroke© (actually its an International light duty industrial motor, but lets not nitpick) and the fuel system is so damn strong that it worked just fine until I hit hills. Yes, Texas is that flat. Unfortunately the relay is not replaceable. The entire fuse box has to go. No stress, we can totally slap one in. Tomorrow. It’s in Dallas. Or Houston.

So…. we get to spend the night in a hotel in Texarkana. Of course, we can’t move in until after 2. We get to stand around the dealership in the back with the rest of the street urchins. Smelling great.

The hotel was awesome! If you are in Uganda. I mean - holy crap this place needs work. I will be dealing with that later.

Anyway…. we get moving the next day about 1130 am, and make it home Tuesday night about 4:30 PM. Praise Ya.

Sleep. Food. Stress over.

Um…no.

This morning I head on up to the shop / office to start the day at “Glorious Peoples Factory #27” (GPF#27). I fire up my personal laptop (Backup plan #1). In the time it took me to get the fire going and start to warm up the office (about 10 minutes), my personal laptop decides to go tits up.

I tell ya, I’m starting to feel a little bit put on here. Perhaps it’s time to stop being reasonable.

Some of y’all have seen this movie, and some of you have no idea what I’m talking about. I mean “I’m the bad guy?”

Anyway after about a half hour of assorted bullshit I get the warranty thingy filed and Dell is going to install a new hard drive in a few days. My IT guy says “buy Lenovo”. I agree. I was also able to get GPF#27’s laptop to start up and as long as I don’t breathe on it I can keep working until the replacement shows up.

In the afternoon I was able to get my machine to start up and began to save, just like ‘ol J.C. I suspect that something is loose inside the machine, but I am not going to do anything that may violate the warranty. Their dial-a-nerd can check the connections.

So….here we are at the end of this weeks update and just like Hunter Biden, it would seem that everything is going to be OK. I mean, hey the fire’s out….but we are still smoking-ya dig? I’m off to have schnapps and try to decompress just a tiny bit.

Until next week, here are your memes.